Tuesday, July 19, 2016
Size Isn’t Everything: 8 Ways to Please Her
By Laurie J. Watson, LMFT
In sixteen years specializing in sex therapy, I’ve had only three women out of thousands, complain that their guy’s penis was too small. But I’ve had about a hundred guys worry aloud about their size. If you, like these men, are worried that your length and girth don’t fulfill your partner’s needs, here are a few things you can do:
1. Be a good lover. Focus on her body – not your anxiety. Your attentiveness to her pleasure can make you the greatest lover ever. Learn how to arouse her with time, flirtation, and seduction. Her mind is her most powerful sex organ and will respond to your desire and sexual intensity.
2. Keep your belly flat. You may not have stupendous genital anatomy, but women report getting more turned on by looking at his abs than by looking at his genitals. Also, a big belly makes your penis look smaller because your abdomen appears to absorb penile length.
3. Don’t believe porn. Despite what porn suggests, women don’t actually want huge penises and unending intercourse. Really. Really! Scads of my female patients report problems with too large of a penis.
4. Develop great manual technique. Know what you’re doing. Watch her vulva as you arouse her so that you can really understand her specific anatomy. Women report mind-blowing orgasms with concurrent G-spot and clitoral stimulation – nearly only achievable with fingers.
5. Get good at oral sex. Most women can’t climax through penetration, so she’ll appreciate a masterful focus on her clitoris. Oral sex is as powerful for women as it is for men, so developing this skill is a big win.
6. Be open to toys and dildos. If she loves climaxing with a full vagina but can’t feel enough of you, be creative in fulfilling her fantasies. It’s the spirit of play and love that make sex great. Then, after she climaxes, it’s your turn to just let loose with intercourse.
7. Insert a finger along with your penis. Girth is more important than length because vaginal feeling is most intense for about the first 2 inches. She’ll appreciate the extra stretch.
8. Try a textured condom. Some condoms are designed to add texture, thickness, and length.
No body is perfect, and no body stays perfect. But with a little work, sex can feel fantastic for almost any two-body combination.