I came across an article which prompted me to reflect on a case that was relayed to me as a relationships advisor. Let me share a summary of their account, please note the names have been changed to protect the identity of the individuals.
Case 1. Keeping the passion alive
Darren complained that his wife Sarah seemed to have lost interest in her appearance. He declared, ‘I really love my wife and I know we can’t run around naked as before, but when our children go to bed it should be our time, yet it’s not the case! Sarah makes no effort; she might as well be a sack of potatoes. She sits on the sofa in front of the TV wearing those awful tent tops and grandma knickers, eating biscuits and she refuses to be interrupted. Her behaviour is a turn off and it knocks my self confidence, because clearly she has not desire to impress me, I felt unappreciated so I started going out with the lads.’
Sarah on the other hand, remained in oblivion to the red flags. She couldn’t see that her husband was feeling neglected. In fact Sarah was bewildered when Darren told her that he had booked an appointment with ‘Through knowledge gain power Ltd’ to attend a relationship mediation sessions with me.
By the end of the first session Sarah agreed to follow my, ‘Me time plan’ which incorporates making a daily effort with your attire. Within a few months and just a few adjustments in the underwear department Sarah and Darren managed to converse, spend quality time together and rekindle regular intimacy. Eight years later, yes occasionally they do have up and downs as expected but they are still going strong.
I must clarify that as in most cases the couple in question had additional underlying issues that required attention hence I’m not implying that a simply change of attire can fix all challenges within a relationship but men love spontaneity particularly when it involves a treat for them. Sexy underwear, perfume or aftershave can also be useful gift offerings to demonstrate consideration and add excitement to the relationship if the recipient is appreciative.
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