Tag Archives: Challenges

What does a healthy relationship look like?

 

Sexual Reminisces love. 1a

A healthy relationship thrives when you recognise each other’s differences and…

  • When both parties can express themselves.
  • When there is mutual appreciation.
  • When you are happy together.
  • When you and your partner support each other.
  • When you make sacrifices for each other.
  • When you and your partner have patience towards each other.
  • When there is mutual protection.
  • When you and your partner feel love for each other.
  • When you and your partner feel mutual admiration.
  • When you and your partner spend quality time together.
  • When you have effective communication with each other.
  • When both parties exercise person responsibility and tackle challenges.
  • When you and your partner demonstrate forgiveness towards each other.
  • When you and your partner are open with each other.
  • When you have mutual trust.
  • When you and your partner have fun.
  • When you and your partner can be yourself.

Regardless of gender please support a positive platform for discussion and dismiss toxic energies.

  • encourage your partner to have a voice and reap the rewards.
  • Make a stand, escape the revolving negative traps, recover and be free to focus on productive pursuits.

And keep the positive fire burning in your relationship.

Rare Diamond.

 

 

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Love.

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A King…

a king

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Life!

KTFB post 26.08.16.

I drove 300 miles to offer him my naked body.

While riding the lift to my boyfriend Dave’s room at the Holiday Inn, I stole a look at my reflection in the shiny surface of the elevator wall. I looked as I was – a woman in her late thirties who drove through the night with just clothes on her back and a purse in a desperate attempt to hold onto her man.

“Your problem is not that you are desperate to get a man Myra, but do you have to be so obvious about it?” My best friend Janice always asks me. I knew she would not approve of this last minute effort I undertook.

Dave and I were dating for last two years, but in the last six months or so I felt us drifting apart. Then he had this job opportunity in another town over three hundred miles away from where we lived. I was reluctant for him to take this offer as I had a job too, and it would have been difficult for me to move from the town I had spent all my adult life in. We had a few arguments in last week, and finally Dave told me he wanted to give this opportunity a try no matter what. He was to undergo a series of interviews and discussions with the top management starting this morning.

Yesterday evening, I returned to the apartment I shared with Janice, and suddenly I was struck with the certainty that if I did not let Dave know how much I needed him, he would drift away. Not only was he two years younger than me, but also a much more self-assured, outgoing man.

So, acting completely on instinct, I jumped in my car and drove almost all night to the hotel he checked in last evening.

I wanted to act cool, though. I wanted to come across as a girlfriend just eager to give a sexy surprise to her man. Beneath my nondescript t-shirt and jeans I wore my best pair of satin bra and panties. I had even planned some sexy lines when he would open the door. Something like “I am the room service you ordered, Sir.”

All of that went out the door the moment I rang the doorbell, and Dave opened the door in a hotel issued bathrobe. His mouth hung open in surprise, and I tried to smile but midway through that effort, my lips started quivering and my legs nearly buckled. I did not wait for him to move aside to let me enter the room but nearly jumped in his arms, sobbing.

“Myra, my God! What happened baby?” He asked as he held me and awkwardly, and shut the door with one hand. I refused to speak, and clung to him as sobs wrecked my body. I was afraid to even kiss him now for the fear of smearing his face with the tears and the snot. Oh My God, what kind of needy, whiny impression I was making on him?

And then, to my utter surprise, Dave turned my face towards him and wiped my tears with his long, elegant fingers. He shook his head no and gently, so gently closed his lips with mine. That was all the response my needy, shameless self needed. I stood on toes, (he is almost a foot taller than I am) and kissed him back. I pushed my body against his, trying to feel the comfort of his hard, lean body. He walked me inside his small room, and made me seat on the bed.

“What happened baby?” he asked me again.

I knew there was no way I could get away acting cool now. Fuck cool, fuck asserting yourself girl, you need him, tell him so.

“Please don’t leave me Dave, I…. I love you and I …” I again broke down. I put my head on his shoulders, and sobbed while he stroked my dark hair.

“I need you to be with me Dave” I said when I could. My cheeks were burning with shame. I could hear Janice’s voice in my ear, “Good, why don’t you throw yourself at his feet, and offer yourself as his concubine while you are at it, darling?”

Dave sat with his head bowed for a minute. When he looked up, his brown eyes seemed strangely expressionless, but his hand reached and unbuttoned my blouse’s top button. I involuntarily drew my breath, and closed my eyes. Another button opened, and then another. He eased my shirt over my shoulders. My breasts heaved inside the sexy bra I wore. Looking down at my slightly oversized breasts in the red bra, I felt silly. Dave would laugh at this silly woman who drove three hundred miles wearing the ‘fuck me’ clothes.

Instead, he eased one strap from my shoulder. My nipple, exposed to the chilly air of the room, stiffened instantly. He bent to take it in his mouth, and sucked on it. His hands fumbled on the bra clasp on my back. He undid it with my help, and pushed so that I lay on his bed with my legs still dangling. Dave dropped his robe and rolled on top of me. He closed my lips with his, and kneaded my breasts with both hands. I grinded my crotch against his, and felt his manhood getting in attack mode. Our clothes could not come off soon enough for me. Soon I lay on my back with my legs bent at knees. Dave stroked my face, and kissed me again while entering me. I gasped and let out a long sigh. Dave thrusted harder, and I responded with an arched back.

“Oh you silly silly woman…” he murmured as he built the tempo of our lovemaking. The cheap bed of the motel creaked as I wrapped my thighs around his hard middle, and held his strong shoulders. Dave buried his face in my breasts and sucked on my nipples again. Our lovemaking was sweet because we were both in it, intense because it was unexpected. When we finished within a few moments of each other my face was wet with my tears.

I mostly stayed in bed through the day while Dave went to meet his prospective employers.

He returned in the early evening and found me in bed, recently showered, scrubbed and gloriously naked. Dave discarded his suit, and climbed in bed with me.

This time, he made me sit on all fours, and entered me from behind. We rarely fucked in this position, and having a man sitting on his knees behind my ample rump and entering me from behind drove me even wilder. Dave too was excited to find his girlfriend waiting for him in bed like this, and this time we were feverish, he was a little rough; spanking my bottom a few times, and kneading my breasts through my armpits till they had his marks on them. I buried my face in the pillow, and allowed my man to ram me to both our content. We finished with Dave sitting in bed with his legs spread before and me straddling him. He held my buttocks, and guided me up and down on his hard cock. I held his shoulders and impaled myself willingly again and again on him. Dave gave me big love bite on my breasts at the moment of climax.

Dave wanted to take me out and buy new clothes since I had packed nothing except for the blouse and jeans I wore. I told him I had no interest in sight-seeing. I stayed in the room and watched TV most of the time he was out. When he was in, he was in if you know what I mean!

Dave got the job, and decided move to the new city. He asked me to move in with him t, and despite of most of my girlfriend’s advice to the contrary, I decided to give up my job, and move with him. Dave and I made it work. I got pregnant within six months of moving to the new place (I did not have much else to do hehe), and we got married when I was five months along.

It is six years to that incident now, and we have two boys aged five and four. When the boys are a little older, Dave and I are planning to check in the same room of the same hotel.

I will pack nothing except the clothes I am wearing.

 

Source: Thought Catalog http://thoughtcatalog.com/monica-abraham/2016/08/i-was-terrified-of-losing-my-boyfriend-so-i-drove-300-miles-to-offer-him-my-naked-body/ 

By: Monica Abraham

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Tips for you. 5 Ways to Overcome Premature Ejaculation « Healthy Sex

HEALTHY SEX

5 Ways to Overcome Premature Ejaculation

By Laurie J. Watson, LMFT

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Web image august 16

 

The first time James had sex, he climaxed immediately. His partner grimaced, which he interpreted as commentary about his “failure.” He was quick on the trigger from then on, believing he couldn’t please a woman. Finally, after James met someone special, he became desperate to solve this problem.

Premature ejaculation (usually reaching climax in one minute’s time) is the number one sexual dysfunction affecting 30% of men of all ages (18-59). PE’s biggest sexual consequence is shame – further exacerbating the problem. Fortunately, PE is typically the easiest male sexual problem to resolve. Here’s how:

  1. Remember, it’s not just about you. Lovemaking is pleasure, connection, and eroticism between two people. Sure, men may feel humiliated when they climax before they want to, but the real problem is that they withdraw in anger, disgust, or shame – away from the sexual moment, away from their partner. Mistakenly, she may think he’s angry at her, not at his own short fuse. The truth is, lots of woman could care less about his rapid ejaculation. If she’s in the majority, she doesn’t even climax with intercourse. She wants closeness, sexy time, and her own orgasm. Being left high and dry by his withdrawal from the bed is usually her real complaint. Try saying to her: “You’re so sexy, I just couldn’t help myself!” And stay in the game until she finishes too.
  2. Orgasm quickly. Go again. My favorite intervention for premature ejaculation is the take the brakes OFF. I get agreement from the couple for him to go for broke! Ejaculation is caused by two things – anxiety and erotic stimulation. When he is prescribedto climax quickly, there is no anxiety. His enjoyment of sex rapidly increases as he gains control and allows himself erotic thoughts. A second intercourse in one encounter usually ends with a slower climax.
  3. Stimulate the whole body. While traditionally it’s the woman who needs  a body rub to warm up to the sexual moment, a guy with PE could really use one. He learns to experience enjoyment in his whole body instead of just the excitement in his penis. Spreading the sensations decentralizes his obsession and anxiety about his performance, focusing him on pleasure.
  4. Sex therapy. Unless the PE issue is complicated by trauma, severe childhood upbringings, or marital distress, sex therapy can be successful within a fairly short time. Standard treatment uses guided steps of progressive sexual stimulation to stop well before he feels the inevitability of climax. If his partner is cooperative and enthusiastic, a good outcome is nearly guaranteed. Often, the biggest problem is that men wait too long to address the problem; the delay in getting help complicates their relationship and compromises their partner’s willingness to participate in treatment.
  5. Medical interventions. While I favor behavioral techniques, medical intervention can help in certain situations. Urologists may prescribe a low dose anti-depressant of the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) type, which has the notorious and, in this case, useful side effect of slowing down orgasm. Also available by prescription are topical anesthetics in the form of sprays and cream that numb the sensation of the penile skin without diminishing feeling in his partner’s vagina.

Premature ejaculation is a difficult problem but the answer doesn’t have to be – it just requires a willingness to take action. Stop climaxing quickly by getting help quickly!

Source: http://blogs.webmd.com/healthy-sex/2016/07/5-ways-to-overcome-premature-ejaculation.html

 

 

Size Isn’t Everything: 8 Ways to Please Her

man and woman in bed

HEALTHY SEX

Tuesday, July 19, 2016
Size Isn’t Everything: 8 Ways to Please Her
By Laurie J. Watson, LMFT

In sixteen years specializing in sex therapy, I’ve had only three women out of thousands, complain that their guy’s penis was too small. But I’ve had about a hundred guys worry aloud about their size. If you, like these men, are worried that your length and girth don’t fulfill your partner’s needs, here are a few things you can do:

1. Be a good lover. Focus on her body – not your anxiety. Your attentiveness to her pleasure can make you the greatest lover ever. Learn how to arouse her with time, flirtation, and seduction. Her mind is her most powerful sex organ and will respond to your desire and sexual intensity.

2. Keep your belly flat. You may not have stupendous genital anatomy, but women report getting more turned on by looking at his abs than by looking at his genitals. Also, a big belly makes your penis look smaller because your abdomen appears to absorb penile length.

3. Don’t believe porn. Despite what porn suggests, women don’t actually want huge penises and unending intercourse. Really. Really! Scads of my female patients report problems with too large of a penis.

4. Develop great manual technique. Know what you’re doing. Watch her vulva as you arouse her so that you can really understand her specific anatomy. Women report mind-blowing orgasms with concurrent G-spot and clitoral stimulation – nearly only achievable with fingers.

5. Get good at oral sex. Most women can’t climax through penetration, so she’ll appreciate a masterful focus on her clitoris. Oral sex is as powerful for women as it is for men, so developing this skill is a big win.

6. Be open to toys and dildos. If she loves climaxing with a full vagina but can’t feel enough of you, be creative in fulfilling her fantasies. It’s the spirit of play and love that make sex great. Then, after she climaxes, it’s your turn to just let loose with intercourse.

7. Insert a finger along with your penis. Girth is more important than length because vaginal feeling is most intense for about the first 2 inches. She’ll appreciate the extra stretch.

8. Try a textured condom. Some condoms are designed to add texture, thickness, and length.

No body is perfect, and no body stays perfect. But with a little work, sex can feel fantastic for almost any two-body combination.

Souce: http://blogs.webmd.com/healthy-sex/2016/07/size-isnt-everything-8-ways-to-please-her.html?ecd=wnl_sxr_081116&ctr=wnl-sxr-081116_nsl-promo-v_2&mb=6%2fcjf0QxQ3e%40AHIpZMdWGRXFE73IOX1cwaU62rnyZkQ%3d